Is meeting new people tough for you? Because it is for me. Sometimes excruciatingly so.
I don't think of myself as shy. In fact I love introductions. But group meetings? eep! When I'm sans security blankets (i.e. husband, baby or friends) I have to push myself to go. The ones where others are flying solo, like exercise classes or meeting other moms, ain't no big thang. But conferences or events? People come armed with friends and I get scurrrrred.
It seems like somewhere along the road of child to adult, group encounterings got tough. I was constantly put in these situations as a kid and most of the time came out with a new bestie. Or at least someone to swing on the monkey bars with.
But now I just try to make it out unscathed by my foot-in-mouth comments. You know, like the ones that lead people to think my husband had intimate moments with a man (which no, he did NOT.) I go in terrified of cliques, because there always seems to be one, and then when I'm talking worry that I am cutting others out. I don't want to seem like I'm trying to fit, but I also don't want to seem aloof. Shouldn't I just be me?? Of course! I try. But I'm being honest here, and I get scared.
Maybe we are all in the same boat? Maybe we are all a bit fearful of new peeps and groups and fitting in? 'Cuz if that's the case, we need to join together and say cliques suck and we want to be friends and sing kumbaya! I'd be down with that. I could join a little singing/swaying kumbaya session with some gusto. But until I find that group, I just need to practice. Put myself out there. And hope there are more monkey bars.
LIVE THE MURRAYED LIFE