Thursday, May 30, 2013

A Waltz We All Dance

Blog Every Day in May


After tucking the baby in for the second time last night, this kiss around 3:45 am, I tossed and turned and tried to turn my brain off. I was stuck on names, whether to keep my new or return to my old, something which has troubled me off and on for the past three years. I tried all my tricks to relax, yet nothing worked, and somewhere in the dark restlessness I remembered today's topic.

Letting Go...

Something that I struggle with. Something that just doesn't come naturally to me. Something that my mind fights into the wee hours of the night.

I hold on to people-- wanting anyone of any importance to stay in my life, even if they simply had a season that has passed. I hold on to mistakes. I hold on to opportunities missed and chances unfulfilled.

And while holding on can be detrimental, it can also breed good. It can make you fight for love and for what you know to be right. It can give you strength to know who you are and what you stand for-- to hold on to yourself. It can give wing to hopes and dreams that you just can't abandon.

So to me, letting go and holding on are in an intricate dance. Sometimes one leads, sometimes the other, and neither is good at taking control when it should. I need to guide them, to choose when to let each shine. I need to allow letting go to take the lead a bit more, but not to have a solo number. While holding on brings sadness and frustration and anger, it can also bring hope. And what is life without hope?

One day we will get it right, letting go and holding on and me. We will display an intricate waltz that's beautiful to all, of turns and steps that have taken years of practice. They will ebb and flow, fluidity at it's finest. People will wonder how I do it, how do I let things go? And the answer will be time. Time and practice. Lots and lots of practice. At least this is my goal: it's a dream that I choose to hold on to.


**Linking to Just Write.**
LIVE THE MURRAYED LIFE
Posted by Christina @ The Murrayed Life at 10:34 AM

19 comments:

  1. Shaylynn... a girl, a story, a blogMay 30, 2013 at 11:00 AM

    So this is beautiful, and you're decided on keeping the name? yes? i say, yes.

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  2. UnknownMay 30, 2013 at 11:03 AM

    I toss and turn some nights as well, over thinking things and analyzing everything.

    Mel
    http://mels-corner.blogspot.com/

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  3. Jillian L. SchweitzerMay 30, 2013 at 11:05 AM

    "So to me, letting go and holding on are in an intricate dance."

    All yes.

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  4. bpMay 30, 2013 at 11:11 AM

    NICELY PUT! Really well written. I think the way you expressed your sentiment on the letting go/ holding on dance well illustrates how it is for so many of us. You're right though, that letting go breeds good. ;)

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  5. Kaitlyn AionoMay 30, 2013 at 11:11 AM

    So so beautiful. One day we WILL get it right but I love that you recognize the importance of letting go AND holding on because each serve a purpose in the whole process. Love this.

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  6. Rachel SedakerMay 30, 2013 at 11:44 AM

    You put it so well- it's like a dance. And sometimes you have to let go in order to hold on (letting go of resentment in order to hold onto a relationship that is important). And YES! What is life without hope? (cue Wilson Philips)

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  7. 17 PerthMay 30, 2013 at 12:19 PM

    Beautiful words...and I cannot agree more--it is like a dance and one I struggle to do often. Knowing how I should dance, but wanting to change it out of fear or simple control.

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  8. Mary HillMay 30, 2013 at 3:30 PM

    What an interesting and beautiful look at the issue. So poetic. I had not thought of it in that way. It is a balancing game. When do we hold on and when do we let go? When do we give up the fight or hold tight? Love it. ;)

    http://mary-anderingcreatively.blogspot.com/

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  9. RowenaMay 30, 2013 at 4:55 PM

    Beautiful post! My illustration today was about the same thing :)....only one day left of this challenge x

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  10. RebeccaMay 30, 2013 at 5:00 PM

    I love your dance analogy, it sums it all up perfectly. I struggle with letting go also and I hate letting go of people but I am slowly learning that some people are only in our lives for a season and that letting them go is sometimes best for all involved, it's not easy but it's necessary.

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  11. Soulz RebelMay 30, 2013 at 5:07 PM

    You've summed it up nicely. I wonder who's perfected this dance? I know I haven't.

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  12. Erika from AmericaMay 30, 2013 at 6:43 PM

    Christina, I really enjoyed this... It highlights that little tricky thing about life -- that you can't master a skill fully until you understand its opposite. That... holding on is just as important as letting go... and both situations can look so similar on the surface, but it's really up to us to decide when we should do either. And that's hard.

    I definitely let go too easily to some things and hold on too tightly to others. There are lessons in this, yes, but I can't wait until I'm perfecting this waltz as well. Until then, I will have to pop, lock, and drop it on the dance floor. :)

    --Erika
    http://www.chimerikal.com

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  13. Whitney LeighMay 30, 2013 at 11:01 PM

    I've never been good at intricate dances. :)

    I hold on too. I'm a big time holder. But lately I've been through a lot of heart breaking crap and I'm just done being hurt. and being angry. Those are the feelings I let go of. But love? I'll hold on as long as I can.

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  14. DeidreMay 31, 2013 at 12:12 AM

    I think there is a lot of pressure to let things "roll off" of us. And it's really important to give yourself the time to grieve, think, laugh, enjoy, hold on and extract all the things from that Thing before letting go.

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  15. Sue // As It SeemsMay 31, 2013 at 2:36 AM

    You are very right about the dance of life. To hold on, to fight a little longer, to try a little harder... Or to just let go and move on with our lives? It's something I've debated too many times in my life. I loved your perspective here! xo

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  16. Bailie @ The Hemborg WifeMay 31, 2013 at 4:05 AM

    The wee hours of the night are the ones that are perfect for the obsessing mind, when I cannot sleep I often find myself dredging up things I thought I had long ago let go of. I do like though your readiness to admit that some things are best held tight.

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  17. katrynkaMay 31, 2013 at 8:07 AM

    I am in the same boat of preferring to hold onto people in my life.

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  18. Poke The RockMay 31, 2013 at 9:36 AM

    I am so jealous about the way you can express yourself with words. I agreed to everything you said and I wish my brain could come up with something like that. Want to do a brain swap?

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  19. Melanie @ Life's Sweet WordsMay 31, 2013 at 3:54 PM

    What a beautiful post! Tears were welling up when I got to the end. And it's so true, it really is a dance between the two. There are so many times when I have held on thinking that maybe I should let go and yet I hold, spinning faster and getting dizzy but that when the dance slows down I realize it was worth holding on and the dizziness just made for a better dance. Thank you for sharing this. Have a wonderful weekend!

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Comments are kinda the best and brighten my day! :)

And psst... I'd really love to write back, but usually do so through email, so I hope you're not a no-reply commenter!

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